Hlavní Znělka
Zpívají:Les Clayton,Kenny McCormick,Kyle Broflovsky,Eric
Cartman,Stan Marsch
Les: I'm going down to South Park, gonna have myself a time.
Stan,Kyle: Friendly faces everywhere, humble folks without temptation.
Les: Going down to South Park, gonna leave my woes behind.
Cartman: Ample parking day or night, people spouting,"Howdy neighbor!"
Les: Heading on up to South Park, gonna see if I can't unwind.
Kenny: I like girls with big fat titties, I like girls with big vagina.
Les: Come on down to South Park and meet some friends of mine.
Pan Hankey (vánoční hovínko)
Zpívá:Kyle Broflovsky
Mr. Hankey the Christmas poo
He loves me, I love you Therefore vicariously he loves you
Even if you're a Jew Sometimes he's nutty, sometimes he's corny
He can be brown or greenish-brown But if you eat fiber on Christmas Eve
He might come to your town Mr. Hankey the Christmas poo
He loves me, I love you We Love you
Osamělí Žid
Zpívá:Kyle Broflovsky
It's hard to be a Jew on Christmas
My friends won't let me join in any games And I can't sing Christmas songs or
decorate a Christmas tree
Or leave water out for Rudolph cuz there's something wrong with me My people
don't believe in Jesus Christ divinity
I'm a jew, a lonely Jew, on Christmas Hannukah is nice but why is it
That Santa passes over my house every year And instead of eating ham I have to
eat kosher la key
Instead of deck the halls I'm singing ????? And what the f*ck is up with
lighting all the f*cking candles tell me please!
I'm a Jew, a lonely Jew I'd be merry, but I'm Hebrew, on Christmas
Kylova Matka je Děvka
Zpívá:Eric Cartman
Kyle's moms a bitch, she's a big fat bitch
She's the biggest bitch in the whole wide world She's a stupid bitch if there
ever was a bitch
She's a bitch to all the boys & girls Monday she'a a bitch & Tuesday she's
a bitch
And Wednesday & Saturday she's a bitch Then on Sunday just to be different
She's a super king camaya maya BIOTCH! Have you ever met my friend Kyle's mom
She's the biggest bitch in the whole wide world She's a mean ol' bitch & she
has stupid hair
She'a a bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch Bitch bitch bitch bitch bitch
bitch bitch
and she's a stupid bitch Kyle's mom's a bitch & she's just a dirty bitch
Kyle's mom, is a , Bi-i-i-itchahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Mountain Town
Stan: Theres a bunch of birds in the sky And some deers just went running by
Ohhh, the snows pure and white on the earth rich and brown Just another sunday
morning in my quiet mountain town The sun is shining and the grass is green
Under the 3 feet of the snow mean This is a day when its hard to wear a
frooooown All, the happy people stop to say hello!
Stranger: Get out of my way!
Stan: Even though the temperature is low Its a perfect Sunday morning in my
quiet little mountain town
Sharon: Well good morning Stan!
Stan: Mom, can I have eight dollars to see a movie?
Sharon: A movie? But I thought you were going ice skating...
Stan: But this is going to be the best movie ever! It's a foreign film from
Canada
Sharon: All right, all right; here you go, but be back for supper!
Stan: Thanks Mom!
Sharon: Oh what a picture perfect child Just like Jesus, he's tender and mild He'd
a wear a smile while he wore a thorny croooooown What an angel with a heart so
sweet and sure And a mind so open and pure Thank god we live in this quiet
redneck mountain town!
Stan: Hi, is your son home?
Ms. McCormick: I think so... HEY!!! (Stan: ow) Kenny, wake up... Kenny dammit
come on
Kenny: Im coming or Okaaay
Stan: Kenny the Terrance & Phillip movie is out, you wanna come?
Kenny: (something another)
Ms. McCormick: Where the hell do you think you're going?
Kenny: I'm going to see Terrance & Phillip
Ms. McCormick: You can't, you have to go to church!
Kenny; But Mom, I wanna see this movie!
Ms. McCormick: Well fine go ahead and miss church; and then when you die and go
to Hell you can answer to Satan!
Kenny: OK!
Stan: You can see your breath hanging in the air You see homeless people, but
you just don't care It's a sea of smiles inwhich we'd be glad to drown
Kenny: ( not sure )
Stan: That's right, its sunday morning in our quiet little white-bred redneck
mountain tooooown!
Kyle: OK, Ike lets try this one more time
Ike: (cant tell)
Kyle: Kick the baby!
Ike: Don't kick the baby
Kyle: Kick the baby
Stan: Kyle, we're going to the Terrance & Phillip movie
Kyle: Oh my god dude!
Sheila: Kyle, what's going on?
Kyle: Nothing, we're going skating now
Sheila: Oh, well take your little brother out with you
Kyle: Aw mom, he's not even my real brother, he's adopted
Sheila: Do as I say Kyle!
Kyle: Ok, ok I'm sorry
Sheila: Look at those frail and fragile boys It really gets me down The world is
such a rotten place And city life's a complete disgrace Thats why I moved to
this redneck meshugannah quiet mountain town
Cartman: Mom, somebody's at the dooor
Mom, somebody's at the dooor, I said! Liane: Coming hon...
Cartman: Ahh, I can't see the TV
Generic Reporter (could possibly be Creamy Goodness): It's been six weeks since
Saddam Hussiein was killed by a pack of wild boars and the world is still glad
to be rid of him
Liane: Oh Look Eric, it's your little friends
Ike: Buyman...
Cartman: What are you guys doing here? (sees movie ad) OH SWEET DUDE, YES!!!
Four boys: Off to the movies we shall go Where we learn everything that we know
Cuz the movies teach us what our parents don't have time to say!! And this movie's
gonna make our lives comeplete! Cuz Terrance & Phillip are sweeeeet
(Cartman: Super sweet) Thank God we live in a quiet little red-neck po-dunk
white-trash
(Kenny mumble) U.S.AAAAAAAAAA.
Stan: Can I have 5 tickets to Terrance & Phillip: Asses of fire please?
Clerk: No!
Uncle Fucka
Terrance: Shut your fucking face uncle fucka You're a cock sucking ass licking
uncle fucka You're an uncle fucka, yes its true Nobody fucks uncles quite like
you
Phillip: Shut your fucking face uncle fucka You're the one that fucked your
uncle, uncle fucka You dont eat or sleep or mow the lawn, You just fuck your
uncle all day long (fart noises)
Terrance: Hmm! (fart noises) (laughing) (fart)
Dudley Dooright guy: What's going on here? (fart noises)
People: Oooooooooooooooooooooooh
Fucker fucker uncle fucka fucka fucka fucka fucka
T & P: Shut your fucking face uncle fucka (Terrance: uncle fucka)
Terrance: You're a boner biting bastard uncle fucka
Phillip: You're an uncle fucka I must say
Terrance: Well you fucked your uncle yesterday
Everyone: (laughing)
People: Uncle fucka... thats
Everyone: U-N-C-L-E fuck you Uncle Fuckaaaaaaaaaaaaa tonight...
Phillip: ...Suck my balls!
It's Easy, mmmkay
Mr. Mackey: There are times when you get suckered in By drugs and alchohol and
sex with women-mmkay But its when you do these things too much That you've
become an addict and must get back in touch You can do it Its all up to you-mmkay
With a little plan you can change your life today You dont have to spend your
life addicted to smack Homeless on the streets giving handjobs for crack Follow
my plan and very soon you will say, its easy mmkay Step 1: Instead of ass say
buns, like "kiss my buns" or "you're a buns hole" Step 2:
Instead of shit say poo, as in "bull poo", "poo head" and
this "poo is cold" Step 3: With bitch drop the t cuz bich is latin for
generosity Step 4: Dont say fuck any more cuz fuck is the worst word that you
can say So just use the word mmkay!
Children: We can do it its all up to us-mmkay (mmkay) With a little plan we can
change our lives today
Mr, Mackey: you can change it today
Everyone: We don't have to spend our lives shootin up in the trash Homeless on
the streets giving handjobs for cash Follow this plan and very soon you will say
Its easy mmkay!
Mr. Mackey: Step 1
Children: Instead of ass say buns, like kiss my buns or you're a buns hole
Mr. Mackey: Step 2
Children: Instead of shit say poo, as in bull poo, poo head and this poo is cold
Mr. Mackey: Step 3
Children: With bitch drop the t cuz bich is latin for generosity
Mr. Mackey: Step 4
Children: Dont say fuck any more
Everyone: Cuz fuck is the worst word that you can say
Children: Fuck is the worst word that you can say We shouldn't say fuck, no we
shouldn't say fuck, fuck nooooo!!!
Mr. Mackey: Your cured, you can go!
Everyone: We don't have to spend our lives shootin up in the trash Homeless on
the streets giving handjobs for cash Follow this plan and very soon you will
saaay Its easy mmkay!
Children: It's easy mmkay!
Mr. Mackey: It's easy mmkay!
Children: It's easy mmkay!
Mr. Mackey: It's easy mmkaaaaaaaayy
Children: It's easy mm
It's easy mm It's easy mm It's easy mmkaaaay (both finish at same time) (laughing)
Mr. Mackey: Mmkay Mmkay Mmkay
Blame Canada
Sheila: Time's have changed Our kids are kids are getting worse They wont obey
their parents They just want to fart and curse! Sharon: Should we blame the
government?
Liane: Or blame society?
Dads: Or should we blame the images on TV?
Sheila: No, blame Canada
Everyone: Blame Canada
Sheila: With all their beady little eyes And flappin heads so full of lies
Everyone: Blame Canada Blame Canada
Sheila: We need to form a full assault Everyone: It's Canadas fault!
Sharon: Don't blame me For my son Stan He saw the darn cartoon And now he's off
to join the Klan!
Liane: And my boy Eric once Had my picture on his shelf But now when I see him
he tells me to fuck myself!
Sheila: Well, blame Canada
Everyone: Blame Canada It seems that everythings gone wrong Since Canada came
along
Everyone: Blame Canada Blame Canada
Some Guy: There not even a real country anyway
Ms. McCormick: My son could've been a doctor or a lawyer it's true Instead he
burned up like a piggy on a barbecue
Everyone: Should we blame the matches? Should we blame the fire? Or the doctors
who allowed him to expire?
Sheila: Heck no!
Everyone: Blame Canada Blame Canada
Sheila: With all their hockey hubbabaloo
Liane: And that bitch Anne Murray too
Everyone: Blame Canada Shame on Canada The smut we must stop The trash we must
smash Laughter and fun must all be undone We must blame them and cause a fuss
Before someone thinks of blaming uuuuuuuuuuuuuus
Kyle's Mom's a Bitch
Cartman: Wellllll... Kyle's mom's a bitch She's mom is a big fat bitch She's the
biggest bitch in the whole wide world She's a stupid bitch if there ever was a
bitch She's a bitch to all the boys and girls On Monday she's a bitch On Tuesday
she's a bitch On Wednsday through Saturday she's a bitch Then on Sunday, just to
be different, she's a superkinkamayamayabeeatch Have you ever met my friend Kyle's
mom? She's the biggest bitch in the whole wide world She's a mean 'ol bitch and
she has stupid hair She's a big big big big big big bitch Big big big big big
big big bitch, she's a stupid bitch Kyle's mom's a bitch and she's just a dirty
bitch For tons kids around the world it might go something like this: (Weird
Japenese stuff to the tune) (Weird Dutch stuff to the tune) (Weird African Tribe
stuff to the tune)
Cartman: Have you ever met my friend Kyle's mom? She's the biggest bitch in the
whole wide world She's a mean 'ol bitch and she has stupid hair She's a big big
big big big big bitch
(Other children: Gasp)
Big big big big big big big bitch, she's a stupid bitch Kyle's mom's a bitch and
she's just a dirty bitch I really mean it Kyles mom, she's a big fat fucking
biiiiiiitch Big old fucking bitch ass mooooom Yeah Chaaaa
What Would Brian Boitano do?
Stan: What would Brian Boitano If was here right now? He'd make a plan and he'd
follow through That's what Brian Boitano'd do!
Kyle: When Brian Boitano was in the Olympics Skating for the gold He did two
Salchows and a triple Lutz while wearing a blindfold
Cartman: When Brian Boitano was in the Alps Fighting grizzly bears He used his
magical fire breath And saved the maidens fair
Everyone: So what would Brian Boitano do If were here today? I'm sure he'd kick
an ass or two That's what Brian Boitano'd do!
Cartman: I want this V-chip out of me It has stunted my vocabulary
Kyle: And I just want my mom to stop fighting everyone
Stan: For Wendy I'll be an activist too Cuz that's what Brian Boitano'd do!
Everyone: What would Brian Boitano do? He'd call all the kids in town And tell
them to unite for two That's what Brian Boitano'd do! When Brian Boitano
traveled through time To the year 3010 He fought the evil robot king And saved
the human race again
Cartman: And when Brian Boitano built the pyramids He beat up Kublar Kahn
Everyone: Cuz Brian Boitano doesn't take shit from anybody So let's get all the
kids together For we have to stop our moms And we'll save Terrance & Phillip
too Cuz that's what Brian Boitano'd do And we'll save Terrance & Phillip too
Cuz that's what Brian Boitano'd dooooo Cuz that's what Brian Boitano'd do!
Up There
Satan: Sometimes I think When I look up real high That's there's such a big
world up there I'd like to give it a try But then I sink Cause it's here I'm
supposed to stay But I get so lonely down here Tell me why's it have to be that
way? Up there, there is so much room Where baby's burp and flowers bloom
Everyone dreams I can dream too Up there Up where the skies are ocean blue I
could be safe and live without a care Up there They say I don't belong I must
stay below alone Because of my beliefs I'm supposed to stay when evil is sown.
But what is evil anyway Is there reason to the rhyme "Without evil there
could be no good So it must be good to be evil sometimes" Up there, there
is so much room Where baby's burp and flowers bloom Everyone dreams I can dream
too Up there Up where the skys are ocean blue I could be safe and live without a
care Live without a care If only I could live up there Oh I wanna live yeah I
wanna live up there Oh baby Oh I want to live up there
La Resistance
Howard McGillin: God has smiled upon you this day The fate of a nation in your
hands And blessed be the children Who fight with all our bravery Till only the
righteous stand You see the distant flames They bellow in the night You fight in
all our names For what we know is right And when you all get shot And can not
carry on Though you die La Resistance lives on You may get stabbed in the head
With a dagger or sword You may be burned to death Or skinned alive or worse But
when they torture you You will not feel the need to run for Though you die La
Resistance lives on
Shelia Broflovski: Blame Canada Blame Canada Because the country's gone awry
Tomorrow night these freaks will fry. The men of South Park: Tomorrow night Our
lives will change Tomorrow night We'll be entertained An execution What a sight
Tomorrow night Satan The Dark Prince: Up there, there is so much room Where
baby's burp and flowers bloom Tomorrow night up there is doomed And so I will be
going soon Terrance and Phillip: Shut your fucking face uncle fucker You're a
boner biting bastard uncle fucker
Phillip: Looks like we may be out of luck
Terrance: Tomorrow night we're pretty fucked
Stan Marsh, Kyle Broflovski, Eric Cartman: Why did our mothers start this war
What the fuck are they fighting for When did this song become a marathon
Satan The Dark Prince, Shelia Broflovski: I want to live up there When Canada is
dead and gone there'll be no more Celien Dion
Howard McGillin: They may cut your dick in half And serve it to a pig And though
it hurts you'll laugh You'll dance a dickless jig But that's the way it goes In
war you're shat upon Though you die La Resistance lives on
I can change
Saddam Hussein: Some people say that I'm a bad guy They may be right They may be
right But it's not as if I don't try I just fuck up Try as I might But I can
change, I can change I can learn to keep my promises I swear it. I'll open up my
heart And I will share it Any minute now I will be born again Yes, I can change,
I can change I know I've been a dirty little bastard I like to kill, I like to
maim Yes, I'm insane, but it's OK Cause I can change It's not my fault that I'm
so evil It's society, society You see my parents were sometimes abusive And it
made a prick of me But I can change, I can change I can learn to keep my
promises I know it. I'll open up my heart And I will show it Any minute now I
will be born again
Satan The Dark Prince: But what if you never change? What if you remain a sandy
little butt-hole?
Saddam Hussein: Hey Satan Don't be such a twit Mother Theresa won't have shit on
me. Just watch Just watch me change Here I go I'm changing Hey Satan!
I'm Super
Big Gay Al: Bombs are flying People are dying Children are crying Politicians
are lying too. Cancer is killing Texaco's spilling The whole world's gone to
Hell But how are you? I'm super Thanks for asking All things considered I couldn't
be better I must say I'm feeling super No, nothing bugs me Everything is super
when you're Don't you think I look cute in this hat I'm so sorry Mr. Cripple But
I just can't feel too bad for you right now. Because I'm feeling So insanely
super That even the fact that you can't walk Can't bring me down Background
singers: He's super Thanks for asking All things considered He couldn't be
better he must say
Big Gay Al: I'm super No, nothing bugs me Everything is super when you're Don't
you think I look cute in this hat These little pants, this matching tie That I
got at Vogue I'm super Background singers: In the barracks and the trenches as
well
Big Gay Al: Stick 'em up.
Background singers: Big Gay Al says do ask do tell
Big Gay Al: Skittles
Background singers: Yes he's super and he's proud to relay
Big Gay Al: OK
Background singers: Everything is super when you're gay! When you're gay!
Mountain Town Reprise
Chef:Everything worked out What a happy end Americans and Canadians are friends
again So let's all join hands and knock oppression down
People of South Park: Good Lordy I'm fine!
Stan Marsh, Kyle Broflovski, Eric Cartman: Don't you know Our little lives are
now complete
Shelia Broflovski, Sharon Marsh, Liane Cartman: Cause Terrance and Phillip are
sweet.
Shelia Broflovski: Super sweet.
People of South Park:Thank God we live in this quiet, little, piss-ant, redneck,
po-dunk...white trash, kick ass mountain town.